Cirrhosis of the River

Sparks and Co take to the water, 2015

Readers who have been with me for a while now, will know of our love of canals and all things narrow-boat; there have been many posts (e.g. http://deefer-dawg.blogspot.ie/2008/07/are-you-wondering.html) from our Kent days covering our family holidays with the Silverwoods in hired boats. We did them every year for a few years and loved every one of them. They are one of the (few) things we miss about our UK 'dinky*' lives. Well, for all of those years and many before and since, bro-in-law 'Sparks' has also been doing the boating thing but his was always Irish style.

Entering the Albert Lock on Jamestown Canal. 

No narrow canals here and few decent wider ones, so here they take to the huge and long River Shannon and, instead of our 7 foot wide, 56 foot long 'buses', they go out in enormous gin-palace look-alike River Cruisers. Sparks and a gang of his work mates (not always the same lads; they tend to rotate in and out of the idea) have been doing this now for 14 years or so, always in May. When they started these were, apparently, rather lairy 'booze cruises' and became known as the annual "Cirrhosis of the River" trip. Now, of course (cough) they are all much more sensible and mature, have kids, families, mortgages and a reduced ability to recover from 'benders', plus they are all mad keen foodies and cooks. They compete with each other to serve up the best food in the galley and chug down stream as a group of gourmets, snacking on home-made pork-crackling and the like.

Crazy fools let me steer!

One of these trips coincided with the end of the house-build here and I can remember us putting in some 15 hour days trying to get some jobs finished in time to let Sparks away to Carrick for the start of it, and he has asked us every year to come and meet them at the boat's latest moorings. So far we had not managed it even though, as they pass through Carrick, they are only half an hour's drive from here. This year we determined to correct that and finally got to see them, look round the boat and, absolute icing on this boaty cake, joined them for a bit of a cruise up the river.

Familiar role. Liz waits while the Lock fills.

Our job was to arrive at the Albert Lock on Jamestown Canal at 3 p.m. on the Saturday (16th May). We decided to come provisioned up, so we packed bags full of eggs (goose and chicken), chutney, tomato and chilli 'jam', honey and a specially baked honey and orange polenta cake, plus called by Tesco to get them a bottle of red and a bottle of white. They seemed quite pleased to see us (!) - no seriously, the lads welcomed us aboard enthusiastically and were immediately great 'craic' and excellent company. We left the car at the lock knowing that the 45 minute cruise up into Carrick could be 'undone' by a 15 minute, reasonably priced taxi ride. These hire boats, even opened up on the wide river where nobody cares about wake and wash, will still only do about 7 knots, so you don't get far from your car even if you go at it all afternoon.

An apéritif on the 'sun deck'? It might look warm but that's
a chilly wind across that open water.

So, full of nostalgia for the gazillions of do-it-yourself locks on the Pennines, we entered the Albert Lock and waited while the Lock Keeper secured everybody to his satisfaction, took their money and then did his thing with gates and sluices. We were off up the canal and then out into the hugely wide, open river, the lead boat of a little short-term convoy of 3 boats from the same hire company (Emerald Star). When signed up 'Skipper' Tony suggested I take a turn at the driving, I was in like Flynn.

I used to do 99% of the 'driving' on our narrow boat trips (I was always 'volunteered' but I wasn't complaining) so I spent 99% of the time we were in motion standing up at the back of the boat, a noisy diesel yammering away just below my feet. tiller in my hand, open to the elements; lovely in the sunshine but get that poncho/cape on a bit quick if it started raining. I did plenty of driving while soaked to the skin. These river cruisers are a completely different kettle of fish. You get to steer using a big, chrome steering wheel, in a comfortable seat and at the front fo the boat. You have a choice of driving seats - up aloft or down in a cozy, waterproof cockpit with a proper windscreen and even windscreen wipers. The lads had even developed a code for 'take over below' when it rained - drop the joystick into neutral and thump twice on the deck with your foot. Then you can nip down the companionway and out of the rain. Luxury!

Sparks at the 'indoor' controls.

So, we had a thoroughly enjoyable Saturday afternoon messing about on the river, picnicking on fine cheese and wine with the lads and just enjoying the company and relaxation of superb people. Thank you very much Sparks for letting us on board and we hope you enjoy the remainder of your break. We bade them farewell as they snatched a public mooring right in the middle of Carrick and they wandered off into town, amused by the 30-40 party-dressed young ladies tottering off a hire-able party-boat in their heels and short skirts, clutching part-drunk pints of lager, part of a Hen Night which looked like it was already well under way at about 5 pm. We headed for the nearby big hotel in pursuit of a taxi to take us back to the lock.

Chased up the Shannon by two similar hire-boats.

We are determined to do it all again next year if Sparks is 'playing' and the tradition of Cirrhosis of the River makes it to 2016. Even though we are not now in a position to do the old style family narrow boat weeks or fortnights (finance and livestock 'babysitting') we do dream that one day, in our dotage, Liz and I might nip over there and hire a little 2-berth from Shire Cruisers of Sowerby Bridge, who served us so well for many years just has Sparks has been looked after by Emerald Star of Carrick. If you've not tried these holidays but always hankered after a bit of river-based 'messing', then do yourself a favour and sort one out just so you know how much fun they can be.

Sparks and Liz (Tony behind) moor the boat up in Carrick at
the end of our little outing.

* DINKY - Dual Income No Kids (Yet)

Narrow Boating

Yes, readers, You'll know by now that we have been absent for 2 weeks on our standard family holiday, narrow boating round the canals of Yorkshire with the Silverwoods with, this time, two extra passengers.

The Silverwoods brought along their new dog, Maxwell, he of the night time commando raids covered in this blog 6 months ago. This poor little mite has now been bought, rejected and moved on several times in his short life, so the Silverwoods have now adopted him and agreed with everybody involved that this is now for ever and he is now owned by them so that he can have a secure and safe home for ever more. There's no more "Oh, we think we might like to try him back now". Also on the trip came that bl***y gnome. I'm going to have to have words with him. Thinks he can take over my blog, huh? We'll see about that.

So, it was the usual set up. We hire the boat from Shire Cruisers in Sowerby Bridge who are, as always, brilliant. We cannot praise them highly enough for their boats, friendly service, booking all the 'pinchpoints' like access over controlled summits and through restricted tunnels, etc. We hire the 56 foot 8-10 berth job 'Northumberland' because we like the fact that you can see straight down the length of it from the central front door to the central rear companionway, so it's easy for the humans to count children and dogs in a hurry. Other boats have doors to the side of a corridor which moves from port to starboard, but that's just our preference. The picture here shows her in the basin at Sowerby Bridge waiting for us to load.

The first day is all about packing the car, loading dogs and driving North - it's about 4 and a half hour's driving, Kent to Sowerby Bridge and on this occasion we get there before the Silverwoods, who are coming over from Ireland, so we're embarked and stuff stowed, sitting having a coffee and then the pre-flight briefing when they arrive. There is thorough training but now after 6 years we only get the refresher version, sign all the paperwork and take over our boat. We are doing the Pennine Ring anti clockwise, so we're off round through Tuel tunnel lock and on up to Brearly for our first, quite easy day. We moor, as usual by the school playing fields, so that kids can let off stream running round on the grass and paddling in the stream, and we dogs can get to know Maxwell.

Properly under way tomorrow.

Deefs

All good things

Ah well. All good things must come to an end, they say, and Friday morning has us waking up fairly early, passing on breakfast while there's a blitz of tidying and packing, before we drive the boat the last few yards to the home basin to moor up. Dad and Mrs S bring the cars over so that all the luggage can be unshipped and stowed in the cars.

Mum, Dad and various Silverwoods take small fistfuls of money into the hire shop to buy souvenirs, mugs, fridge magnets, maps and books ready for next time, sweeties etc. We hand the boat in, Mum 'fessing up about the cardboard in the DVD player (we were insured anyway, but we also agree not to get re-imbursed for the pump-out, so it's kinda quits). We say our cheery goodbyes to Susan at Shire Cruisers and to the guys who are already crawling all over the returned boats preparing them for the next customers. We say our farewells too, to the Silverwoods, who are off to "Thomas Land" (Thomas the Tank Engine at Drayton Manor) next and we head South.

It's been a brilliant holiday, and we are all excited about maybe doing the "South Pennine Ring" next year, but it is lovely to be back en famille with our nice quiet car-ride home, nice quiet house and a chance to get sorted out over Saturday and Sunday before the humans have to go back to work Monday.

It's been a blast

Deefski

Citron Brioche

Dad is driving a work-mate home today to Ashford, and she is going on about "Citron Brioche" but in a dog context, and leaving him completely confused. It's only when he says "But isn't Citron Brioche a kind of lemon flavoured pain-au-chocolat thing?" that she stops, and realises she is actually talking about the dog breed "Bichon Frisee". Easy mistake to make?

Meanwhile our saga of the Good Ship Sussex comes to a close. No more dramas. Just an early start for the boys climbing the 2 locks out of Salterhebble, and then chugging back along the 45 minutes of well wooded canal to Sowerby Bridge. Here we kill the speed completely and execute a very nifty reverse turn to dock back alongside an sister-ship at the wharf, to be greeted "home" by Susan and all the team at Shire Cruisers.

It's been a fantastic week of energetic and relaxing fun and, as usual we are already talking excitedly about doing it all again next year. While we've been chugging along the ladies have finished the packing (all the Silverwoods' stuff arrives "packed" in black bin liners (nice and squishy to fit in the weird shaped cubby-holes and lockers on these boats - no place for rigid suitcases here!- so it's simply bagged back into those for the move back to the cavernous boot of the S's people carrier.

We dogs are disembarked and tied to a handy bollard, the younger kids carried to the cars and strapped in, while the grown ups and the older children chain-gang the stuff up out of the boat and across the right car. Mum executes a lst blitz of tidying and wiping down ( we just KNOW the cleaning gang is going to be fearsome Yorkshire gals, who probably were up at 05:00 scrubbing their front steps, and we don't want them to think the worst of Kentish domesticity).

Then we buy a few bits from the company shop, say our goodbyes to each other and to Susan and co, and we go our separate ways, the Silverwoods heading for the Thomas the Tank Engine land of Drayton Manor (that one mainly for young M's benefit), we off across to the M1 and down South again.

It's been a blast
Deefski

The Good Ship "Sussex"

Another week with no postings, but this time for a very very good reason, namely we were away on this year's Narrow Boating Holiday. Regular readers will know that we use Sowerby Bridge (near Halifax) based firm Shire Cruisers, whose boats are all named after counties, and this year we were on the good ship "Sussex".

We are only just back, and we are still unpacking and recovering, the humans de-grunging in the shower and Mum feeding us all, so much much more of all our adventures later, and over the next few days, but for now let a couple of pics suffice, to give you some idea. The 3-dog pic is left to right, megs, my good self and the H, and the single dog posing above the "Sussex" name plate is, of course, H-man.

We had a whale of a time, making up for the shallow-water, no-access disappointments of 2007 by successfully negotiating the summit over to Littleborough, and managed to give Mum all she could need in terms of relaxing, shopping and bimbling after the 2008 hard-charging go-go-go deadlines mission through Leeds to Burnley.

Much more over the next few days.

Lurve

Aft-Deck Hand and Lock-wrangling assistant, Deefer

Are you wondering....?

Were you wondering where we'd all got to, not posting a blog since Friday last? Ah well, we can now reveal that we have once again escaped to Yorkshire to go narrow boating. Once again we hired from Shire Cruisers, whom we can heartily recommend (no vested interest - just a brilliant service and lovely boats)

http://www.waterscape.com/services-directory/1895/shire-cruisers

Again, too, our start point was Sowerby Bridge, but this time our mission was to head down the Aire and Calder navigation canal system towards Wakefield, then north to Leeds and onto the Leeds and Liverpool Canal, climbing over the Pennines to Burnley. Don't be put off by the city names - all canals were built to link cities - the buzz comes from the country bits and small towns in between - and the lock-wrangling.... like the 3-rise and 5-rise staircase locks at Bingley, and the loooooong tunnels (You're in Foulridge for a full 20 minutes of chugging).

We were there for the full week, from Saturday to Saturday, and spent the time with the Silverwoods, including new Baby-R. So look out for the next few posts as I relate tales of sea-faring derring-do and adventure, and post a few heroic pics of we three dogs.

Cap'n Deefski